Upset

I keep thinking about my friend, Phoebe/Pheebs. I lost her about a year ago. And ever since then it's been kinda hard for me to make friends. Not that i couldn't make friends, but i didn't wanna make any(Apart from my bffs) because.....how do i put this...Alright, you meet someone, and you make friends, you start to really like that person, and then they have to leave. Imean, It's either they die or they have to move or...I dunno but somehow, they have to leave somehow, you know and it's really hard for me to "let them go" And i hardly discuss any of this with the friends i have now because...i guess it's just too much for me to handle and i just can't help crying. It's like i have a very powerful connection with someone and then when they're finally gone, i can't move on with my life. But one thing that i could do with is a lot of support from my friends and best mates. I cannot handle anything right now and i certainly cannot handle losing a friend or a best mate. Any ideas on cheering me up would be nice.